Justine Bateman: What do you call this?

Oh dear…Justine Bateman. You know, Mallory Keaton was my idol. Not only did she go out with the adorable, albeit stupid, Nick, but she also knew everything there was to know about fashion. That’s why it pains me to see you in this. What is this? I’m thinking tablecloth ..but who would buy such a thing? Now that you have steady work again, perhaps you can afford to go out and do Mallory justice.